Struck On the Head

So...

at about 10p.m. the other night my girlfriend Ashli and I were still hanging out at her dorm and decided to go out to grab a cheeseburger. So we made our way down to the back of the building and exited the south entrance. We were headed out of the double door and Ashli was walking slightly ahead of me. She pushed open one off the doors and walked through, as I looked down to make sure her laptop didn't fall out of my hands or bang into the door.

As I looked down I heard a loud noise and turned to see the metal pillar, that allowed the doors to lock, hit the ground and bang again. I looked up and asked "did that hit you?!" She replied softly "yes." As soon as I realized it hit her in the head I ran over and checked to see if she was bleeding, luckily no. She whispered "wow," between two little sobs and I helped her to my car where she sat down and held her swollen head.



Now this bar was hefty. It must have been at least thirty pounds that crashed down on her head. She was much more terse than I would have been. Where she let out a few soft sobs I would have been yelling things that would make sailors blush. We decided that the best place to go was her university police station and file a formal complaint, which we did promptly.

After dealing with an idiot clerk that would only give us one ice pack we had to sit through a wanna-be cop's interview. It took him half an hour to figure out what had happened and to write it down. He was content to have us sit beside him as he took his time turning on the computer, commenting about how dirty his slacks were from the dust, and told us a story about his days working at an Ames department store where he was badly hit in the head once. To top it all off, as we left he gave us a grin and said to me

"Take it easy on her tonight Matt... Don't ruff her up too bad."

What a ponce. Well, at Ashli is o.k. now after going to the nurse the next day. The diagnosis isn't grim and it will be a quick recovery. And so ends another harrowing adventure in...

The Life and Times of Matthew Lee